Needed There

I used to need to be there to assess academic progress, to assist students who struggled with phonics or math concepts or reading comprehension. I used to need to be there to tutor kids one on one in various subjects, usually reading concepts such as mini-lessons in weekly phonic concepts and word-attack strategies. I used to need to be there to stand up in front of a room of 20 knowledge-hungry, or sometimes even starved, second graders. I used to need to be there to teach a whole-class session on some grammar lesson, like sentence structure or parts of speech, or a writing lesson on grouping related ideas. I used to need to be there to give guided practice to small groups in rounding to the nearest thousand or adding and subtracting fractional parts of wholes or regrouping in subtraction. I used to need to be there to teach nutritional-eating habits, global-community awareness, and life cycles of plants and animals. I used to need to be there to participate in calisthenics and dodge ball or soccer. I used to need to be there for faculty or leadership meetings and trainings in new adoptions or new teaching strategies, like guided language acquisition and design. These were the important things for which I used to need to be there.

Now I need to be there to kiss and bandage boo-boos and to sing the “Stay Awake” song at bedtime. I need to be there to remove stubborn lids from Play-Doh jars, to zip up unwieldy pant zippers, to replace dead toy batteries. I need to be there to wipe bottoms and dump potty chairs. I need to be there to play house or piece puzzles together or to read books after naptime or to push the swings. I need to be there to model respect for others, how to share, to say, “I’m sorry,” to exhibit self-control with my temper. I need to be there to draw the pattern for walking with the Lord, to read my Bible daily, even when I have work to do, to pray when I place the first out-of-bed foot on the floor and before each meal and even between meals when I need wisdom or guidance, to commit to church attendance every Sunday, even when I didn’t get much sleep the night before, to praise the Lord even when times are difficult or when I’m depressed. I need to be there to exemplify how to love as a good wife should love or a good mommy or a good friend. These are the vital issues for which I now need to be there.

The more I am there for my children, the more conscious I become that He is there, as my heavenly father, when I most need Him to be, no matter how small or trivial the trial I face, and in this I take great comfort.